It's funny isn't it...the way life works out. I remember being a teenager and thinking, I can't wait til I'm in my 20's. I'll have a great job, money to burn, a great guy, my own home, and probably a puppy (cause dogs are the bees knees and every home should have one. Unless you're a cat person. Or renting.) When I got to my 20's and still didn't have my life sorted I realised that I had the age thing all mixed up, and knew with absolute certainty that being 30-something meant all of my plans and dreams would come to fruition!
Where is my house in the country? My overseas adventures? All my extra cash? And where the heck is my dog!?
Do I sound ungrateful? Probably. But I promise you, I'm not in the least bit disappointed with my 'Lot' in life (except for the dog bit). I have 'the great guy' that I always dreamt of, and he's definitely all that and a bag of potato chips. I was able to gain my degree and experience the hectic life of the nurse that I thought I always wanted. I also have 3 pieces of my own heart racing (or rolling) around my feet, calling me mama!
These are things that I am 100% grateful for every single minute, of every single day.
But you know, something is missing. (Aside from the dog and the house in the sticks) I actually miss not knowing what was coming. I miss the adventure of heading full speed into something unknown (granted, my kids do throw a mean curve-ball on the regular...usually at my head when I'm not looking). And I miss doing fun little things (outside of my family life) that make my heart happy.
What I need are goals!! And dreams!! And hobbies too, dammit!!
I remember a time when I thought owning our own reno' home was a possibility....and a time when I ran because I wanted too, for my health. There was a time when debt-free was in our vocabulary, and so was 'lets go camping'. There was a time when I was permanently attached to my camera, thinking I could make a go of it, and a time when I couldn't wait for the evenings so I could sit down and babble out a blog post for no one or anyone to read just because I love writing!
But life changes a lot. Sometimes it's good, occasionally - not so much. What I'm starting to figure out is this. There is no reason good enough for you to forget your dreams. You might need to tweak them a bit along the way, or reshape your plan to get there, but never ever forget them! Your hobbies? They're who you are (who hasn't seen Inside Out...hockey island??) Don't lose the person that loves these oddball hobbies! Embrace them and find a way to make them fit, because losing your personality isn't going to benefit anyone (least of all the family you may have forgotten them for in the first place!)
You know what happens when you forget your dreams and your passions?? Nothing. Well, nothing but a gradual decent into holey tights, hairy legs and a 3 day old singlet covered in food and who knows whose boogers (why did spell check try to change that to rogers??)! Yes, I'm speaking from experience (and honestly, those Rogers could be anyone's). I have so many excuses as to why I'm in a rut. None of them are worth the cosy chair I'm sitting on.
So while it's a bit late for the whole 'new year' thing, here are my 'oops-it's-nearly-february-resolutions'!
- Pick up the camera.
- Point it at something and shoot.
- Start planning that dream renovation home.
- Make a plan to Kill Bill....or kill our bills, whatever.
- Run like Forrest. Also, stretch.
- Blog when I want to, not when I think I should.
- Shave leg hairs. Repeat.
- Cook. Cause we've gotta eat and stuff.
- Can some stuff. (Come on tomatoes, I need ya on board for this one!)
- Show my kids that there's always adventure just lying in wait, around every corner, in every blanket fort, and up every tree. But that there's also adventure in hidden places too, like treading new territory in the kitchen, or finally saving up to buy something you always wanted, or even finding a new hobby.
So hey, thanks for hanging out!! Here's to life!!
(lol, just kidding. I'm off to binge watch Property Brothers)