Friday, 3 February 2012

The Garden of DOOOOM!!

  Forenote:  Please ignore the random ramblings that may appear in this post, sleep hasn't really happened much lately!!

Yup, that's right.  My garden sucks big hairy meatballs!!! My green-fingers have turned a puke-brown/yellow color and so have half of my plants!!

Where did i go wrong!?  Was there not enough love??  Too much perhaps??  Or was it all thanks to a wonderfully tropical weather pattern that's enveloped our sweltering land!!??  (Thanks La Niña!!)  Either way, my garden is about 80% dead....(Please excuse me a moment, Hubby strangely thinks im interested in talking techy stuff.....right!)...and there is absolutely nothing i can do to fix my vegebals!! 

Lets start with exhibit A - Sweetcorn

The cobs stopped growing when they were about 10 cms long, then started to rot!  I couldve picked them early but i chose to hold out and hope for a sudden miraculous healing for the poor cobs....God obviously didnt want me eating corn this season.  At least it provided a home to a nation of teeny spiders!

Then it was my broccollii taking a turn for the worst!! (Possibly because i never figured out how to spell Broccooli?)  

Flowers, flowers everywhere, and not a Broc' to eat!! (Hehe, I think im funny!)  I was so proud of my Brocolli heads until they started to look more pretty, than edible!!  (Also home to teeny spiders!)

For some reason my Silverbeet escaped the papparazi, but it's doing well anyway!!

This is my lettuce....

But wait, i hear you ask, isn't that a strawberry??  Why yes, yes it is!!  IT ATE MY LETTUCE!!  ...What actually happened is that my lettuce sprouted multiple heads and stopped producing tasty leaves so i had to evict it from its prime planter box spot!!
(Im not even going to ask Hubby why he's sniffing his wait, i am going to ask.....hmmmm, apparantly he's not sniffing his computer...he's just trying to 'feel' where the heat is coming from...with his nose...! Uhuh)
Strawberries!! Yay!!  Aside from eating my lettuce my strawberries have been busy sprouting runners left, right and center and trying to dominate the planter box!!

Since the strawberries are so delicious i shall let the plant roam free!!

My bean plant has been playing a few mind games with me since it's first batch of beans were picked!!  After being taken out by a marauding strawberry plant, it made a wee come back and got leafy again.  Unfortunately the beans themselves didn't do so well.

Yep, that last pic is a bean.  A rather dead bean!  But just when i thought all was lost, i spied two big juicy beans on the plant!!  (Hubby ate said beans before i could get a photo!)

What's next.....Oh i know!!! My wee herb garden!  

My Mint is half dead (i might add that its actually growing wild at the front of the house, it's only my garden mint that's died), my Thyme grew pretty flowers and i cant even begin to tell you where my Parsely went!!

And now for the grand Finale!! 

My Tomato plant!!!  
Weak from bearing the weight of big juicy tomato's, my poor tomato plant has tragically been taken by a wicked fungal infection that i have heard reffered to as 'The Blight' (Dun dun duuuun!!)

Who knew plants could get fungal infections!

Oh, my spinach is also going well, but i didn't get a pic of that either!  On a funny little side note, Hubby's broccolli is doing really well!!

Possibly because it's actually A CABBAGE and doesn't really care how we spell Broocolli!!  

So that's my Garden of Doooom for ya's!!  (I will accept sympathy in the form of wine and choccy's!)  I hope everyone else is having more luck with their gardens!!  Stay tuned for a re-plant edition coming soon!! 

Toodles!!  :)

"Live for a Life without Regret"


  1. Oh this post made me laugh! If I had a garden I can assure you it would look much much worse than this one!

  2. Oh my goodness! i have a parsley plant that completely died... my basil is still going strong. Isn't it crazy how plants grow wild and have survived that way forever...but when we try to plant them, we Hopefully I will get some veggies from my garden when i get it going. Atleast those strawberries are going well.

  3. HA HA HA HA!

    Well you certainly didn't lose your sense of humour in this whole thing. This blog post is hilarious!

    P.S. It's broccoli. Hope that helps for next time. LOL.

  4. Oh my goodness, hilarious post!!!